Forgive Us (Deliver Us #3)

To everyone else, Trace is an enigmatic and carefully controlled Dominant. He runs Diadem, a private BDSM club and is a Master and mentor to his fellow Doms and their lovers—Gabriel, Darrek, Ben, and Kyle—while trying to be Master and lover for Micah. Trace is the one they all depend on to step in when anything or anyone threatens his closest friends.

But even Trace is in over his head when haunting events of the past endanger all their lives. Trace is forced to call on old connections for help from the world he tried to leave behind—the Master’s Circle in England. Tensions rise to a fever pitch as Trace’s hidden truths shake up the lives of everyone in his tangled, tight-knit family. (M/M+)

How did you get here?

Chapter 8: Threesome

A couple of days later, Micah is still staying with Trace when Lilianna reappears and stops by to check on him. It puts a smile on Micah’s face when Lilianna runs up to hug him and say how much she’s missed him, because he can tell it’s sincere. Though she’s careful not to ask what Micah’s been up to in the meantime, she happily fills him in on the latest news from work and the errands she’s managed to complete. Not a word is mentioned about the day she left, Moira’s birthday. Micah’s foggy memories of it fill every awkward lull in the conversation.

Not an hour into the visit, Trace and Lilianna are heavily in conversation in the living room after Trace pulls her aside to fill her in on some aspects of his past. Micah lingers in the doorway, already privy to everything being discussed. He steps back to give Trace the chance to catch Micah’s wife up on some of the recent confessions he’s made about his past. Strangely, that’s always been the way between the three of them. Trace is the mediator of the group, the one to speak privately to each of the others, then work out a compromise or solution. Lilianna is the one who initially brought Trace into their bedroom. Trace is the one who has pulled the strings to keep himself there. The longer the three of them are together, with whatever definitions you want to use, the more Micah is aware of how his wife and Trace call the shots, in their own ways, leaving Micah to step back and follow their commands.

Even now, with Trace’s secrets being revealed at long last, telling Lilianna is something that needs to happen between Trace and Lilianna. Sometimes Micah feels he belongs to his wife. Sometimes he feels he belongs, instead, to Trace. Sometimes he belongs to both of them, equally, together, submissively waiting for them to come to an agreement or understanding. They respect him and his needs, and he trusts them to have control. Or, at least that’s the way it’s supposed to work. Lately, he’s not so sure he’s getting the respect and trust he deserves from his wife. The trouble comes from figuring out a way to speak up for himself without ruining everything. But, the longer he waits to say something to her, the harder it is to do so.

A half-empty glass of Trace’s scotch is in Micah’s hand, the alcohol already consumed and burning away some of Micah’s reservations. They have a lot to talk about, but maybe some truth doesn’t have to be conveyed in words. The three of them have always been better at getting to know things through more physical expressions anyway.

Lilianna knows her husband is there, but hasn’t glanced his way in a while. The startling nature of Trace’s news, as well as his natural intensity, are certainly going to demand Lilianna’s attention. Micah knows it. It’s better for her to deal with Trace first, before opening up the radius of her focus large enough to include Micah, too. Let her be concerned and talk it out. Micah has already been through it. Trace and Lilianna are close enough to handle this privately.

Lilianna is wearing a crimson blouse and a black skirt and looks as beautiful as she always does, her voluptuous, hourglass figure filling out clothes better than any other woman Micah has ever laid eyes on. Trace looks just as good, though. His thickly muscled arms are on display, his suntanned skin and carefully trimmed, dark facial hair. One look at Trace, the strength in his body and the casual, lustful willingness in his eyes makes Micah, and many other people too—men and women alike—go weak in the knees. He’ll kick your ass or fuck it into the ground, depending on what his mood may be. Surrendering to that kind of power is one of the greatest luxuries Micah has ever experienced.

He can hear the concern in his wife’s voice and isn’t surprised when she moves closer to Trace, straddling his lap. It’s a position, ironically, that Micah recently occupied, not that Lilianna knows it. She thinks Micah only indulges in sex with Trace when she’s there, too. That’s one of the biggest untold truths tearing them apart, but the extent of Micah’s love for Trace is doing even more damage.

They begin to kiss and Trace’s hands are on her right away—slipping up inside her shirt, pulling the bra out of the way to free her breasts, rubbing up her thighs, tugging her closer so that her crotch is flush against him as he rocks up into her. Micah sips his drink and sees Trace’s fingers twist sharply under the shirt where they appear to be closed around Lilianna’s nipple. She makes a soft, angry exhale and he knows it’s with small, welcome pain.

Seeing them together still excites Micah, but in different ways than it used to. It no longer feels as thrillingly taboo to see Trace and Lilianna screw around. It’s become comfortable. What isn’t comfortable is how freely Trace incorporates Micah in their sexual escapades without consulting him first about specifics. He likes to push Micah right up against his safeword. That’s probably to force Micah’s hand and make him come clean about where his heart truly lies. But whatever Trace may want from him, Micah is willing to go along with it, discomfort or no. He can take anything Trace throws his way, and enjoy the debauchery while it lasts. It won’t hurry him up if he’s not ready to commit to confessions that could ruin his marriage.

He’s ripped from his thoughts as Lilianna’s fingernails scratch over Micah’s chest. He hadn’t even noticed her cross to him. She takes a handful of his shirt and pulls on it, passing by him with a smile and taking him along with her.

“Bedroom. Move it,” Trace says, following behind.

“So, I guess she took the news well, then,” Micah says, downing the rest of his scotch and grimacing at the taste.

No sooner is he through the bedroom doorway than Trace is pulling off Micah’s shirt. Lilianna’s mouth moves hungrily over the new, pink scratches on Micah’s skin and she makes a few more as she sinks to her knees at his feet, yanking open his fly. She tongues his tip and Trace pins Micah’s hands behind his head, watching the show and caressing through Lilianna’s long dark hair.

“Okay, okay,” Trace says, hurrying things long. “Get on the bed already.”

“Cuffs?” Lilianna asks, taking off her shirt and bra, then shimmying out of her skirt and panties.

“Already attached to the headboard. What can I say? I like to be prepared.”

“Of course you do,” she grins. “Cock ring?”

“Yeah. I’ve got a good one here somewhere.”

Naked, her breasts full and heavy with dark, small nipples, her pussy waxed nearly bare like she was expecting this and spent time getting ready for it, Lilianna manhandles Micah onto the bed. She pushes him up to sit with his back to the headboard. His wrists are put in the cuffs so that they’re bound behind his head. His head buzzes from the booze. The lingering weight of sadness keeps him from protesting or making smartass comments as Trace tosses a few condoms on the bed. Next he tosses the cock ring. Lilianna wastes no time working it onto Micah, getting his balls through, then carefully squeezing his dick through as well.

It’s incredibly uncomfortable and he fights not to writhe as they both smirk down at him.

“Comfy?” she asks Micah while crawling up his body, giving him a slow kiss that’s mostly lips and the tips of their tongues before slinking back down. She teases a trail down his chest and abdomen with her tongue as Trace moves up behind her. He nudges her thighs apart and his fingers go right for her sex. Micah can’t see what he’s doing but can read Lilianna’s reactions quite clearly.

He sighs with annoyance, and maybe a little jealousy, as she chases a quick climax—the first of many, probably—with the help of Trace’s middle finger. Meanwhile, she swallows the head of Micah’s cock and twists her middle finger up his ass.

“Fuck!” Micah complains. “Lube! Come on!”

She chuckles, then hums, then whimpers, her hips twitching as she gets closer to orgasm. Trace steadies her with a hand on her back and seems to really go for it. Lilianna’s noises get wilder and she takes out her torturous ecstasy by fingering the hell out of Micah’s asshole. He grunts and bites his lip, wincing a little and trying to thrust farther into her mouth.

With a telltale choked sigh, he knows she’s come.

“Well, that’s one for me,” she giggles after pulling off of his cock, then takes a long lick up the underside.

Trace, still not wasting any time, pushes a dollop of lube through Lilianna’s sphincter with two fingers and says, “Yeah, that’s to loosen you up a little, darlin’. You don’t mind, right? I’m kind of after one thing.”

The fingers pump into her efficiently, and Micah sympathizes, knowing the feeling. She moans, frowning slightly as she starts sucking him, her hand twisting on his shaft.

“Gentle, please,” Micah says to Trace, tiredly.

“Oh, are you in charge?”

“I said please.”

Removing his fingers, Trace wipes them clean and rolls on one of the condoms, looking right into Micah’s eyes as he does it. Then he moves up closer, behind Lilianna, and starts to enter her. She makes an anguished little cry and Micah closes his eyes, tuning some of it out, but unable to ignore Lilianna’s attention to his bound cock, nor the finger rotating in and prying at his ass. Once Trace is seated and moving more easily, taking her slowly, Lilianna works her mouth more intensely on Micah’s dick, deep-throating him.

“Easy! Fuck!” he grimaces, needing to come, unable to because of the ring constricting him.

She ignores him, of course. After a minute or two, she pulls off and starts to pump the hell out of him with her hand. He gasps, pushing up off the bed. She just slips another finger into his ass and hums happily.

Trace puts an end to it by pulling out, holding himself by the root and taking off the condom.

“Mic, your turn, sweetheart. Babe, get him out of the cuffs.”

Once they’re off, he’s pushed and pulled by two sets of hands, bending him over in front of Trace who coats his own dick in some lube, but no condom. Lilianna kisses Micah, coaxing his jaws open wide, teasing his tongue with hers. He gasps roughly into her mouth when Trace breaches him. The sounds get her going again, kissing him harder. She’s always gotten off on watching men fuck him, and especially Trace. It’s nothing new. Trace forces him to take his whole cock at once and Micah cries out, with Lilianna guiding him down, down, down, until his gasping mouth is between her legs. He tongues her clit, using two digits to finger her while she gets to watch Trace fuck him, no holds barred. She leaves scratches over his back and Trace kneads his ass, giving it everything he’s got.

Lilianna cries out her second orgasm and Micah abruptly stops getting lost in the easy sweep of it all.

Not like this. Not this time. He can’t pretend it’s all the same as it was before, when they first came together, that he hasn’t changed and isn’t the man he now knows he is.

Like he can feel time slowing down, the great wheel of life turning less quickly for once, he discovers, ready or not, it’s time. He wipes his mouth and takes a steadying breath. Feeling Trace’s movements within him, Micah says, “Stop. Red!”

He’s distantly aware of Trace pulling out, of them both asking if he’s okay and what’s wrong. For a long moment it all gets lost in a buzz of white noise until he pushes through to clarity. When Micah comes back to himself, he realizes Trace has him upright on his knees and Lilianna is looking into his eyes with concern, touching his chest and measuring his pulse.

Taking her hand, kissing the knuckles, he fights not to fall back through memory and relive all of the wonderful ways she’s been his devoted partner through so very much. He tells them both, without confidence or certainty, “I want the collar.”

Micah feels Trace understand right away what’s going on from the way his breath moves over Micah’s neck and the energy radiating from his body. He’s become even more attuned to Trace’s rhythms than his wife’s. It says a lot about why the ache of regret in his heart is so strong.

“Collar?” Lilianna asks, confused.

Trace asks, “You sure, love?”

Love how he calls me love, Micah thinks fondly, fleetingly.

“Yes. I am,” he answers, meeting Lilianna’s hurt glare, dead on.

Trace leaves them there to get the collar from a dresser drawer. Returning with it, he fastens it around Micah’s neck, a perfect fit.

Micah may have submitted to Lilianna for most of their marriage, but he never wore a collar for her. Not once.

“How long?” she asks softly, looking only at Micah and looking so hard it feels as rough and sharp as her nails had, raking his chest.

“Long enough,” he admits. “I love him, Lil, but I loved you first. I’ll love you always.”

She breathes out a wounded ghost of a laugh. “God, I’m stupid.”

When she tries to pull free of his grasp, he holds her there. “No. You’re anything but that. I didn’t do this to hurt you. I’m not trying to exclude you, either. Or leave you. I’m just admitting I need this from Trace. Please.”

He lets her go. Her head is bowed and embarrassment colors her cheeks.

“Lily,” he calls.

Gathering her clothes, she yanks them on a piece at a time. Micah starts to go to her, but sways, so Trace goes in his place, telling Micah, “Stay.”

They whisper to each other in the doorway. All Micah can hear is the accusation in her voice, not the words themselves. But then she seems to soften when Trace doesn’t stop explaining and gives every sign of hearing where she’s coming from. The steadfastness in Trace must be something that appeals to Lilianna, too, Micah realizes. It makes sense when you’re someone who never stays still; it helps to surround yourself with those who are constant and reliable. She lets Trace kiss her and pull her in for a hug. Mostly dressed, she finally meets Micah’s gaze and says, “I’m not mad, okay? I get it. I just need some air, and to sleep in my own bed. Are you coming home? I’d like you to.”

“Tomorrow. Promise.”

She nods once, then goes.

Trace doesn’t say a thing after she has gone. The house is quiet again.

Micah tries to feel more ashamed of himself for hurting Lilianna in such a way. But he finds he can’t. There’s too much built-up resentment from the ways she hurt him, too. The whole situation simply feels as miserable as it always has. Everything, suddenly, has changed, but at the same time nothing has changed.

Trace returns to bed, eases Micah down, enters him and takes off the cock ring. In minutes, Micah is exclaiming his powerful climax, quivering around Trace, held in his tight, skilled grasp, giving his body over completely for his lover’s pleasure. Trace bites down on his shoulder while Micah’s body convulses subtly with aftershocks. All of the ways Trace holds him, takes him, and keeps him seduce Micah, helplessly, and he nearly drowns in the force of the white, cleansing fire consuming him, body and soul.

How did you get here?

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