Do Virgins Taste Better?Author(s): R.W. Whitefield
(Available in epub, mobi, and pdf)
Publication Date: July 5, 2012
Click here for Content Labels and more information
Genres: Comedy, Erotica, Fairy Tale, Fantasy, Humor
Tags: dragon, f/m, het, princess, Short Story, Wicked Fairy Tales
As soon as he got to his cave, the dragon set the princess down on a rock outside. She stumbled a little, but quickly drew herself up and arranged the tatters of her gown; the gauzy pink fabric had snagged on the dragon’s scaly claws during his flight. “So sweet of you to rescue me.”
The dragon settled himself on the ground and folded his wings. “Rescue you? I mean to eat you.” He let a little jet of flame escape his mouth.
“Eat me? I know dragons. If you wanted a meal, you would have stolen some of the peasants’ cows.”
“A princess’s flesh is sweeter and softer than that of some peasant’s cow.” The dragon licked his chops, letting his tongue wander slowly over his dagger-sharp teeth.
“Oh,” the princess sighed, “and I’m sure that virgins taste even better, don’t they?”
The dragon nodded. “Virgins melt like honey on the tongue,” he told her. “Their bones crunch better, their blood is sweeter…”
“Hmph.” The princess smirked at him. The dragon fidgeted. In truth, he had never eaten a human, much less a virgin princess.
“Particularly the princesses,” he bluffed, hoping to scare her. “Their skin is so soft and silky, what with the… baths they’re always taking.” As he spoke, he hooked the tip of a single huge claw into the princess’s bodice. “Delicate, untouched by any man.” With a twitch of his claw, he ripped the tattered dress off her body.
To his surprise, the princess didn’t shriek and cover herself, as he’d heard human girls were apt to do. She stretched like a cat, shaking out her red-gold curls and rolling her shoulders. “That dress was terribly itchy. Anyway,” she added, “if virgins are so sweet, I’m sure I’d taste like old hay, I’ve let so many knights sneak into my bedroom over the years.”
An anthology of bedtime stories for adults!
Just what kind of happy goes into “happily ever after?” As children, it was enough that Pinocchio got to be a real boy and that Red wasn’t eaten by the wolf. As adults, we have a slightly different perspective. Being a real boy means having boy parts, and being eaten by someone big and bad doesn’t mean quite the same thing it once did.
Ever wonder what mermaids do with the swimmers they seduce? Or why a dragon might prefer a castle-guarded princess to a nice, easy field of sheep? What if your fairy godmother wasn’t circumspect in what wishes could be granted, or if that dainty little fairy had a much bigger appetite than one might guess?