Genres: Fairy Tale, Fantasy
Collections: Wicked Fairy Tales
Editor(s): Rylan Hunter
Cover Designer(s): D.M. Atkins
Cover Art Credits: "Lie to Me" by Ben Newman (http://bennewmanart.blogspot.com/)
Production Editor(s): Erika L. Firanc
Proofreader(s): Jae Knight
Length: Short Story (2,400 Words)
Publication Date: April 15, 2012
Serialization Date: November 7, 2015
Archive(d) on November 14, 2015
Tags: Geppetto, het, m/f, Pinnochio, Short Story, Wicked Fairy Tales
Content Labels (What they are and why we use them)
According to Sleazy, whose foul mouth and vivid imagination had gotten him banned from all the storybooks, Snow White could take all eight dwarves in a night and still have enough energy for three rounds behind closed doors with a Rampant Rabbit. But Sleazy had been known to lie almost as much as Pinocchio; according to the woodsman, Snow White never touched those dwarves. The one thing Geppetto knew for sure was that she gave Pinocchio’s face regular and thorough workouts.
Aw fuck it, Geppetto thought. He knew the score: he was jealous. The last time he’d lubed his crankshaft, Rapunzel had been wearing a bob. And look at her now: Geppetto couldn’t help remembering the time he’d been working on the fence in the front yard and glanced in the window to spy her mounting Pinocchio. Her blond hair had cascaded over the two of them like a shifting blanket and her completely shaved snatch gleamed with dew. It was almost more than he could bear to think about. Just listening to the wooden brat reaming his way through the Fairyland phone book was the closest Geppetto’d come to a sex life in decades.
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